Oh, Captain! My Captain!
by Daimia De Luke
Summary: First attempt at fanfiction; rated for later chapters. When Ianto Jones accepts a new job in London he meets another charismatic captain. Summary sucks, sorry about that!
1. Happily Ever After?

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If i did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Word Count: 1,557

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter 1: Happily Ever After?

_I came back for you._

The thought didn't cause a flitting of butterflies in his stomach, or a warming of his soul. Instead, it felt like a weight, hundreds of kilos of anxiety and doubt descendant on his shoulders and crushing him through the floors. It should have been a wonderful realization, but ruined in the knowledge that his words were complete and utter rubbish.

Yes, perhaps better than anyone, Ianto Jones intimately knew that Jack Harkness was a brash liar.

* * *

Abby Maitland loved her job. Mainly working with the bizarre and fascinating creatures that had been plucked from their own time into hers, partially for her colorful teammates; especially the man who had become the love of her life. However, like when Connor used to go patrolling alone, 'love' did not stop her from wanting to kill said teammates every once and a while.

The situation at hand: Jess Parker, the ARC's young field operations manager with enough brightly colored shoes to fill an Olympic swimming pool. Forty's style make-up, neat hair, and fashionably professional clothing, gave the accurate impression of someone with a romantic outlook and slightly naive quirks and the two got on well as flat-mates.

Taking a second look at this evidence, Abby resolved NOT to stab Jess with her scalpel. Reasoning the woman's blood would contaminate her latest autopsy. However, as the woman had not shut up for the last two hours, mooning desperately to the point of obsession over the ARC's own Captain Becker, her willpower was steadily dwindling.

She had humored the younger woman; listening to tales of the roguishly handsome Captain and how he would bring her chocolate once the team had returned from a mission, or how he always looked pristine and debonair. Many times, Jess repeated characteristics on her endless "why-becker-is-perfect" list.

Her scalpel was beginning to look sharper and sharper.

* * *

It was moments like this where Ianto envied Owen. The wiry Londoner was easily engaged in casual sex with multiple partners simply because he could. He didn't ask for commitment of fidelity; just a hard fuck in the back alley. No, Owen would never had fallen for the Harkness smile, or flirtatious innuendo. Owen would never had allowed himself to become a part-time shag.

"_What kept me fighting was the thought of coming home to you." _

Ianto watched as Jack took Gwen's hand through the security camera. His body went numb as he heard the man he loved practically confess his love to someone else. Whispers of _not enough_ rang through his rattled frame over and over again.

"Ianto?"

He turned to see Tosh standing in the doorway. "Yes?"

"We're meeting in the conference room, just waiting on you," she smiled and walked away.

"Right. Of course," with one last look at the monitor he was gone.

* * *

"So Jess, she's decent on the eyes, yeah?"

"Can't say. Not really my type."

Connor Temple was brilliant. Ask any employee at the ARC and they would tell you. He was exceedingly handsome; argue that and Abby would shove you into a pen with a raptor. But most importantly, Connor a persistent little fucker when he wanted to be. Just ask Captain Becker.

After hearing Abby complain about Jess complain about how Becker won't ask her out, he decided to take action. Believing all he had to do would be to get Becker to ask Jess out. Then, Abby would stop being in a mood after work, and then the two could be free to be a proper couple.

This proved to be a pain in the Becker's beautiful arse. Days after returning to the ARC, Connor had started in. He asked questions, offered to set the two up, offered to double date, begged, threatened murder, gotten Abby to threaten him, threatened to cut Sid and Nancy loose in his apartment, and a variety of other proposals. Soon, he was sure, Becker's resolve would finally snap.

"Well, maybe she is and you just don't know it yet because you never got to know her outside the ARC," he reasoned.

"She just isn't my type, Connor. Please, let's just leave it at that."

Becker was laying out various weapons. Ranging from hand-held stun guns to the larger, more dangerous inventions Matt had commissioned. Connor had proven capable of cleaning and the general maintenance of the guns, but after being shooting Becker several times, and once tasering himself, the two had resigned their practice for the day.

"And why not? She likes you, and she's smart. So why not?"

"She's a she, Connor. That's why not."

Becker had gone flush, his willpower finally broken. Connor stared slack-jaw. The tough and stoic military captain, was a literal man's-man.

"So, I'll never have to worry 'bout you and Abby?"

* * *

Ianto didn't say a single word from the Hub to the large office building. Jack had made several attempts at conversation. "You should have seen", "Who did this?", "Who did that?". There, he made only few remarks, cutting off Jack's fetish to copiers, and a small welcome back. But this was one time where he had to give Jack a real answer.

"No, Jack. I'm sorry."

The worst of it all was that he truely had been. If not for overhearing Jack and Gwen earlier that night, he knew the outcome would have been different. He just knew that he would have been in the captain's arms tonight, trying desperately not to lose control when Jack called for someone else over his climax.

"When you say no," Jack began.

"No rarely means other than just that, Jack."

"But why?" Jack had been positive that a few dates would have him back in Ianto's graces, but he had not considered Ianto shooting him down flat.

Instead of an answer, Ianto turned from him, checking another desk.

"Was, I mean, were you? Damn," he ran a hand through his hair. "I shouldn't have just taken off and I know I didn't do anything like bring roses but I missed you and-"

"Missed me?" Ianto laughed. "You didn't miss me. You missed having someone bend over your desk and not care that you weren't calling their name. You miss no demands made on you. Do you think I'm an idiot? Do you think I don't know what you look like after sex? That I didn't know it wasn't me who made you look like that? I will not be a part-time shag."

Jack didn't know if it was more frightening to know Ianto was angry enough to curse, or that he hadn't needed to yell. His voice had kept level but in Jack's mind had reverberated off the walls and shattered the windows. Ianto's tirade had given Jack a rare look into the younger man's thoughts on their former arrangement.

"Check the roof. Don't want you getting overexcited," Ianto said definitely.

He had wanted to say so much, to tell Ianto about the year-that-never-was, to apologize for his past infidelities, to beg to be held so that his nightmares would go away. But in shock, he nodded and walked away.

* * *

"So was it romantic there? I know it must have been difficult but obviously something happened," Jess asked.

Abby looked up from the body of a future predator, shot dead on site. Near her was a tray of supposed vital organs and she was up to her elbows in an abhorrent black ooze, which in her belief, was the equivalent of stomach acid.

"You're asking me about romance when I'm up to my ears in sludge?"

"Well the timing was a bit off, I admit."

She smiled, peeling off her gloves with a satisfying snap that made the other woman flinch. "Connor is a born romantic. When we got trapped, he started doing little things to brighten my mood. You know, a bouquet of extinct flowers, tidying up camp while I was on a food run."

"And what else?"

"What else what? All those little things add up and a month in I snogged his brains out," she laughed. "I had to make the first move, he never would have."

"But do you love him? Really love him?"

It was like telling her child of a great, whirlwind romance with a disappointing ending. Abby smiled, hoping to elaborate her story a bit more when that time came. She did, however, know the ending.

"I do. After all, he gave me a happily ever after."

* * *

Nothing was right anymore. Not by Ianto's standards. During Jack's time away he had been unofficially promoted to field agent, he had been more to the team than a coffee boy and glorified janitor. As he cleaned away Gwen's desk, his thoughts began turning.

* * *

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	2. Chocolate Bars and Barbecue Sauce

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If I did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Word Count: 3,261

It gets very AU form here!

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter 2: Chocolate Bars and Barbecue Sauce

Today was not his day, Ianto could already tell. He had been digging up research on anomalies all morning as one had appeared below the docks. The team had been fascinated by it; the way time moved like a candle surrounded by a million slivers of mirror. Now he knew about the ARC, which in his opinion was Torchwood without aliens, James Lester and Nick Cutter. He had gone over the men's reports until his eyes burned. He busied himself with making coffee, occasionally glancing over to where Gwen was bringing Tosh and Owen up to date.

Strong arms wrapped around his waist, "hey."

Ianto dislodged himself from Jack's grip, breathing deeply to control himself. "We're at work."

"So?"

"So it's harassment!" He hissed. "The others might see..."

"They already know we're together, Yan," he argued.

Ianto turned on him, backing him into the counter top. "We are NOT together, Jack. 'Together' implies fidelity, and trust."

Jack's voice softened. "I can be faithful, Yan. Just gimme a chance."

"No you can't, Jack. What would happen when I got old? You would leave. You would leave then just like you left with the Doctor. And I can't do that again," he sighed. He hadn't wanted to do this here. "You can expect my resignation on your desk this afternoon."

Ianto made to walk away, but Jack shot out and gripped his arm in an iron vice. "Ianto, please."

He shrugged from Jack's hold. "Owen's a prat when he hasn't gotten his coffee."

The immortal opened and closed his mouth several times, struggling. "I lo-"

"Don't," Ianto snapped. "Don't tell me things you don't mean just to get me to stay. Now," he loaded five coffee mugs onto a tray. "If you will excuse me."

Rejection lulled queasily in Jack's stomach. "Ianto!"

He turned.

"Have lunch with me?" Jack pleaded.

Ianto bit his lip and nodded, not trusting his voice.

* * *

The ARC was in a state of chaos. Crews were preparing for a reconnaissance mission near Cardiff, all hands working quickly. Jess furiously typed at her control station, monitoring the anomaly at far range and tracking a security breach on the mainframe.

"Anything come through, yet?" Matt called.

"Not that I can tell," Jess answered. "I'm getting some sort of weird feedback. Almost sounds like a generator."

"Well keep at it! Abby!"

The former zoo-keeper looked up from about a dozen metal cases. Around her were cartilages of extra ammunition and batteries.

"Me and Becker have already got the big guns on board!"

"Good!" Matt ran to the observation deck, avoiding several frazzled-looking scientists. He leaned over the edge. "Connor!"

With a jump Connor smacked his head into a table. "All machinery packed and functional!"

"Excellent! Now pick a truck and let's go!"

Like ants they scrambled. Matt, Becker, and two other soldiers piled into driver's seats. Engines revved as they communicated between cars, double checking each vehicle. Abby and Connor loaded into Becker's truck, which was the first out; followed by three others. "Matt just blue-toothed coordinates."

"Then tell him thank you, Connor."

"Thank you Connor!" He yelled into his walkie-talkie.

Abby giggled from the back seat, "this is going to be a long drive."

* * *

He wasn't comfortable with this. Ianto had procured a table outside, public enough so that if Jack made a scene it would be easier to get away. Large umbrella's hung over each table, blocking the rare sunny day.

"Hey you!" Jack was all charm and smiles. He sat opposite Ianto, feet pressed firmly into the ground and hands twined on the table. "Best behavior." He winked.

Ianto groaned. "Can we please just get this over with? I need to let Myfanwy out for some exercise."

Jack chose to ignore his tone. "Come on, Yan. It's a nice day, the seagulls are fighting hookers in boob tubes for chips..."

"I only have thirty minutes , Jack. Say want you want so that we can both be done with this already."

He ran a hand through his hair. "I just thought that this would be good, you know? A proper date?"

Ianto frowned. "I don't want to date you Jack. I want to be free of you. Don't you get it? I sat by watching you fuck your way through Cardiff and the moment, the MOMENT, I wanted something more than a fuck buddy you ran away."

"Yan I've been waiting so long. Just waiting to find him, to see if he could fix me. I wanted him to make me better!"

"So you leave without warning? Jack, do you have any idea of the shit we went through? Tosh thought you were gone for good. She cried thinking you had abandoned us. I slept in your bunk for a month, just waiting for you. Owen hated himself; he thought it was his fault. We NEEDED you."

Part of Jack's mind was warning him not to ask about Gwen; knowing it could be a disaster. He kept his mouth shut, allowing Ianto to continue.

"I want something real. I don't want to die before I turn thirty," he groaned and stood, placing money on the table. "But most of all I want someone who is happy with just me. You can never be that. And I won't ask you to be."

As he walked away he called to Jack, "I will be out the rest of the day. I trust you can handle it?"

He didn't stop for an answer.

Gwen had decided that since Jack was having a date on his lunch then she would as well, calling Rhys to guilt him into meeting her on the bay. She could barely supress her disappointment when he arrived, momentarily forgetting she was meeting him instead of Jack. Throughout lunch as he told her about his work, he also dripped on his shirt, snorted after taking a drink and generally behaved as a typical male. She thought to Jack, who wouldn't have gained weight when they moved in together; who was her action hero capable of anything. As she dreamed, she never registered that Rhys had left without a word.

* * *

Three hours and four car games later, Abby had finally had enough. Connor was still looking for 'J' on the roadsigns when she blurted out.

"So, are you going to tell us?" she leaned between Becker and her boyfriend, eyes set on the soldier.

Becker's jaw tightened. "Don't know what you mean."

A quick exchange of glances with Connor, who shook his head, peaked her interest. "With Jess. I saw you two duck into a corner at the bar last night," she explained.

His nose made a funny sort of twitch before answering, "she asked me out."

Abby's eyes popped out of their sockets. "Yeah. And?"

Becker gave her a gentleman's smile. "I told her that I would rather suck off Connor."

"What the fuck?"

_Abby makes a very good fish impression_, Connor thought. "Well, you see love-"

"Connor shut up a minute. Becker, tell me what happened or I will let Sid and Nancy loose in your flat."

Becker sighed, his eyes never leaving the road. "I was drunk, and she was pushy. She asked to go on a date, so I came out. At least this way she'll stop bothering me."

Stunned, she scooted back in her seat, eyes staring blankly ahead. "So, you're gay?"

"As a double rainbow," he smiled.

She shot an accusing look at Connor. "You knew? And you never told me?"

He glared at Becker. "I only just found out yesterday."

"That's not the point Con!"

_Be advised, creature to the left. Assume containment positions. All hands, repeat. Assume containment positions. _

Matt's voice drifted off the speakers. Looking out the window they could see the massive beast, tormenting sheep in a field.

"Let's make this an easy day," Becker said as he pulled onto the grass.

* * *

Ianto loved watching Myfanwy fly. He tended to make a day of it when his services weren't needed at the Hub. Even with his impromptu trip he had managed to prepare a knapsack filled with dark chocolate bars, retcon, and a large sub sandwich Tosh had given to him for lunch. Myfanwy always seemed to find the same field, filled with fat, white and black sheep. On several occasions she had picked one or two up and had delivered them to her chocolate-bearing caretaker, which he would gently coax back to its herd. In his belief, he had prepared for everything.

That is, however, until he saw four black trucks jerk to a stop. From his vantage point on the hill he saw at least four people vacate each truck, pulling large, silver cases out with them. One team had each person carrying small, handheld devices, another was setting up what looked like a sort of containment tent. The other two were taking aim.

"Wait!" Ianto took off sprinting down his hill, knapsack losing its contents. He pulled one bar from the bag and tore off the paper, waving it frantically. "Wait! She's harmless! Just wait!" He lost his footing and tumbled down, ruining his suit, but still the newcomers didn't see him. Standing, he looked to Myfanwy, still circling to torment the sheep. An idea struck. He pulled out the bottle of barbecue sauce he kept for her and globbed a bit on the chocolate bar he was holding. Above, she changed direction, diving for her treat. "That's it! Good girl, come on!"

"Mate! Look out!"

Ianto hadn't seen the man running towards him until he was on the ground.

"What are you doing?" Ianto rasped. Myfanwy swooped and landed nearby, hissing and snarling at who she believed had attacked her beloved caretaker. She unfurled her massive wings, trying to scare the man away; he took a defensive position over Ianto, targeting her chest.

"Stop it and move!" Ianto rolled to his knees, picking up the dirty chocolate bar and holding it out to her. "Myfanwy stop."

To the great surprise of her audience, she stopped. She folded her wings against herself and ducked her head. The man remained crouched in front of Ianto as the Pteranodon reached for the treat, gasping when she waited for a pat on the head. It was silent as Ianto walked away, beginning to pick up the spillage.

"That was incredible!" The speaker was young and blonde, with blue eyes that reminded him of Jack.

"Careful," Ianto chided. "If she hears you it'll inflate her ego." He offered his hand. "Ianto Jones."

"Abby Maitland," she answered, taking his hand. "This is Connor Temple, Matt Anderson, and that there is Captain Becker."

He took each of their hands in turn, laughing when Connor asked what the barbecue sauce was and helping Becker to his feet. He ignored the twinge he got in his hand when captain took it.

"That was rather impressive, Mr. Jones," Matt commented.

"I try my best," Ianto replied. Myfanwy had hopped beside him, lifting his lapels in search of another snack. She snapped when he felt Connor's hand on the flank, but ignored it as Ianto was stroking her beak.

"How did you get him to do that?" Abby asked.

"Her," He answered. "And she only obeys because I give her chocolate." He broke off a piece and handed it to her. Abby took the bar, her hands shaking. With a deep breathe she held the chunk out to the creature. Connor flinches when a long tongue stretched out and curled around the bar, pulling it in her mouth.

Matt approached cautiously, keeping an eye on the bright yellow one watching him. "And you've tamed her?"

"Well enough." Ianto took a look at the identification badge clipped to Becker and chuckled. "ARC in Cardiff? And we thought the rift was our biggest issue."

Matt stiffened. "And how do you know about the ARC?"

"You don't have clearance for that information, sir."

Becker shifted, trying to hide the emerging bulge in his pants. The fluid Welsh vowels were doing everything for his libido.

"Very well, what do you do?"

"When, I obviously train pterodactyls to respond to chocolate and barbecue sauce, " he replied, completely deadpan.

Matt laughed. "You want a better job?" Ianto looked at him quizzically. "If you can help us find what we're looking for, you've got one."

Ianto's heart rate increased. His luck was changing. "You haven't found the anomaly yet?"

"That's why we need you."

Ianto looked to the other members of the team. By the look of them, they were all well trained in combat, matching brilliance with brawn. Connor and Abby both had eyes a bit more worn than the others, reflecting hardships. But Becker; Becker made his heart stop and his fingers go numb.

"Well Ianto?" Matt asked. "What will it be?"

His decision was made for him when Becker smiled. "I'll do it."

* * *

Little over an uneventful hour later the ARC team was packing away their kit. Ianto stood close by, letting them work in peace. This allowed him opportunity to hungrily rake his eyes over Becker's body as it moved; bending and crouching while his tight shirt raised deliciously. The captain's dark hair only helped to put a spotlight on his grey eyes.

"Ianto?"

Abby came up to him, smile wide. "Con, Becker and I going out to dinner before checking into the hotel. Do you want to come?"

Ianto though back to Jack, knowing he was \saving the world, getting hot and bothered. This brought the point that he would find someone else to take his aggression out on, his promise of being faithful lost to the morning.

Noting Ianto's hesitation, she continued. "He will be there. Smiling. Laughing...Drinking."

He chuckled and took a quick look at the soldier. Moisture had condensed on his brow and down his arms...

"I suppose," he answered timidly.

"Fantastic!"

She bounded over to Connor and whispered in his ear, infecting him with her smile. They spoke quietly for a moment before he pulled her into a slow kiss, short but full of warmth.

Ianto wondered how some people got so lucky.

It didn't occur to him that Captain Becker was thinking the same thing.

* * *

For dinner Ianto took the team to his favorite pub. In his opinion, The King and Crown had some of the best brew and most fantastically painful sea salt and vinegar crisps along the bay. The inside was arranged with large red booths and high tables and chairs, a billiards table, and a dart range. They situated themselves in a circle booth, Connor slyly shoving Becker into Ianto and trapping them together. Every movement caused them to brush against one another.

"So, what's good?" Connor murmered, flipping open his menu. "I'm starved. Could eat a mammoth."

Abby patted his knee. "No mammoth is safe!"

"The chicken is all good, they have a great vegetarian menu. Great milkshakes-"

"You're a vegetarian?" Becker asked. He leaned into Ianto, skimming over the younger man's menu. Ianto turned. He could feel Becker's breath on his face and blushed.

"No, just iffy about most red meat. Bad camping trip." He stated. He turned back to his menu to distract himself.

"A story for another day?"

"If you get the clearance, Captain."

Ianto's tone threw shivers down his body.

After the second round of pints the waiter arrived for their order. By the fourth the small team had received their food. Abby idly stabbed her fried meal while stealing crisps from Ianto's basket, not daring to put her hand between Connor and food. He was exacting no mercy on the thick cut of tenderloin. Every so often he would spoon a dollop of mashed potatoes on top and force the entire concoction down his gullet. Now and again Abby would reach up with her napkin and clear away a bit he missed.

Alcohol muddling his brain, he watched. With each sip he grew more and more envious of the two, having found what he so desperately wanted.

"Are you not hungry?" Becker asked.

Ianto looked down to his dinner. Most of the crisps were still there, while he had only taken a few bites of his sub. Glancing over, he noticed Becker had finished his, save the tomatoes he had pulled off.

"Guess not," he answered. "I don't really have much of an appetite."

"You need to eat more."

Ianto grimaced at the reminder of Jack. Upon Becker's expression, and another round, he tried to lighten the mood. "No one is telling Abby to eat more."

"My Abby is perfect!" Connor slurred. He doubled over the table and Abby laughed.

"Well if you're this pissed already," she teased and moved towards Ianto.

Connor reached out, clumsily pulling her to him. "No! That's not fair! You! Stay 'way from m'Abby."

Becker and Abby were laughing, part due to the alcohol, part by Ianto's never-changing expression. "Can't you share?"

"No!" he screamed. Like a cat he curled around Abby and planted a sloppy kiss on her cheek. "Mine! You! You stay away!"

Ianto chuckled. "I am more likely to seduce Becker. But thank you for seeing me as a threat. It makes me tingly inside."

Between laughs Becker managed to ground out, "That's CAPTAIN Becker!"

Ianto raised his eyebrows. "Really? Oh, Captain! My Captain! What the hell is it with me and captains?"

* * *

**Big thanks to everyone who has subscribed and even BIGGER thanks to those who have/will review. I hope you like the newest chapter!**

**~ Dai**


	3. Fancying Birds and Blokes

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If i did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Word Count: 2118

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter 3: Fancying Birds and Blokes

Connor rolled across the bed to fling his head at a pan Abby had set out for him. His eyes twitched as his bile excreted, some draining out his nose. With a grunt he hoisted away from the soft bed to the bathroom. His fuzzy mind didn't hear the shower going. He pushed open the door to the moan of "Ianto!"

His formerly lidden eyes shot open to a very naked Becker under the shower's spray, tugging his impressive erection. Becker's eyes were closed in bliss as he continued his languid strokes, fingering his balls on the downstroke.

"WHAT THE HELL MATE!"

The captain hurriedly covered his manhood with both hands, his body going beet red. "DON'T YOU KNOW HOW TO BLODDY KNOCK! YOU FUCKING WANKER!"

"YOUR THE ONE WANKING YOURSELF! BESIDES, WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU LOCK THE DAMN DOOR?"

With a huff Becker snatched a towel from above the toilet and wrapped it around his hips. He pushed past the stunned scientist and slammed the bathroom door behind him.

…

Making his way down to the autopsy bay, Owen pulled his coat on and started into work. Everything had to be perfect; it was "Tommy" day. Tosh would come in looking more beautiful than he could imagine and be happy. That was his favorite part. He set his instruments out carefully and watched the cog-door. She arrived late on the 'Tommy' days...

Jack chose that moment to sulk by. His eyes constantly jerked to Ianto's position in front of the coffee machine.

Having heartily disapproved of Ianto and Jack's relationship, he was happy that the young archivist he had come to view as a younger brother was moving on. Though he would never say it, he was proud that Ianto was getting out of Torchwood on his own accord. The younger man wouldn't be dying before he was thirty.

"Not foolin' anyone, is he?"

Owen hadn't noticed Gwen's arrival, seeing as she was on time. For his own sake he disregarded her.

"I mean, you can just tell. Right? He's a little pathetic really." She sighed. "Not like he's all that special. Jack could have anyone."

"What the hell are you babbling about, Cooper?" He answered in a bored voice. Tosh still wasn't there...

"Ianto!" She cried. "Isn't it obvious! He's making Jack _work _for it. But Jack doesn't actually have to. Could just go get any old body and forget all about Ianto."

She was craning her neck to see the two. Jack was leaning against the countertop talking to Ianto.

"You think 'is resignation was fake?" Owen took that moment to focus on the woman's clothing; a dangerously low cut top and overly-tight jeans.

"Of course!"

"He got a job in London," he informed her. "He got a chance for a normal life. He's talking it."

She looked dumbfounded. "But then why is Jack so miserable?"

"Are you stupid?"

"Owen!"

"Jack fucked up 'nd now 'es paying for it. Right justice if you ask me!"

"But what could Jack have done? It's not like he's been here."

"Again; are you stupid? What the hell would you do if Rhys just left without a word for two months?"

"It wouldn't happen," she stated.

Owen was more than skeptical. "And why not?"

"Because he loves me," she stared him in the eye. "He wouldn't do that to me."

Hands balled into fists. "And what makes you so bloody special, eh? You cheated! You're a cheating cow and the only reason Rhys is still with you is because you retconned 'im!"

He dragged her to her feet. "You wanna see love?"

The angry medic took hold of her head and forced it towards the two men. Jack had a hand on Ianto's arm, another cupping his face. He tried to lift the younger man's chin but Ianto wouldn't have it. Instead he roughly pushed Jack away and stalked off, catching his tears with one hand. The immortal rushed to his office where, through the glass, the two onlookers could see him crumble.

"That's love. That's how Rhys loves you. That's how Ianto loves Jack. Except Ianto is smart enough to know Jack can't love him. Rhys just hasn't figured that out."

Letting go of her head he turned her to him. "If Katie had ever done to me what Jack did to Ianto, or what you've repeatedly done to Rhys, I would have left."

The cog-door wailed to life as Tosh stepped through. Paralyzed, Owen watched her descend onto the floor, her dreamy expression crushing his heart.

"I may not be perfect, but at least I have someone who looks at me like you look at Tosh."

…

Tears wouldn't stop. Scratching and rubbing at the offending droplets hadn't helped. On top of it all his pants were now dirty and Ianto would yell at him. He hated making Ianto upset.

_Since when? _The little voice in his head was an asshole; he decided.

Sniffling and snorting he drudged off the floor and into his chair. The paperwork had piled high and he needed a distraction.

…

The archives were his safe-haven. No one ever dared to go down there. Hundreds of years of knowledge and findings kept him company as he calmed himself. Familiar ringing filled the air as Ianto took out his cell phone.

"Hello?"

"Ianto? This is Abby."

The archivist paused. "Oh, good morning Abby. Umm, not to be rude but, how did you get this number?"

"You wrote it on Becker's beer mat last night," she giggled.

Ianto's mouth hung open. "A-a beer mat? Why on – oh god, I didn't. Please say-"

"Relax Ianto, he never saw it. He was too busy sniffing your neck," her smiled could be heard across the lines.

"This isn't funny! My behaving like a tart isn't funny!"

Abby laughed over the line. "You didn't act like a tart. It was cute."

"Nothing happened?"

"Did you want it to?"

"No! No, I..." he sighed. "So what's new?"

"We leave tonight. I wanted to see if you'd come to lunch with me."

"Where?" Please don't be pizza. Please, please don't be pizza.

"There's a soup shop near our hotel that sells wicked sandwiches. I thought we could stop in there?"

Ianto smiled. "Sounds perfect. One o'clock?"

"Yup. See you then!"

"See you then," as he hung up he smiled. London wouldn't be as lonely as he had figured.

…

"Isn't that everything?"

Connor had been put in charge of making sure everything was packed. By put in charge, it meant that Becker made each suitcase neat while Connor circulated the hotel room to check that all the equipment was accounted for. This was his way of hiding his extreme awkwardness around the older man.

"Nearly." He let out an exasperated groan. Pulling the screaming zip to a close he flopped on top of the case. "Now that's everything."

"Becker?"

"Yes Connor?"

"What's it like? Fancying blokes?"

The captain ran a hand through his usually coifed hair. "I dunno. What's it like fancying birds?"

He stopped and directed his thoughts to memories of Abby. "Well, it's like being completely warm, I think. Knowing my hands fit her curves; we just fit." He smiled.

Becker grinned at him. "Take all that and pair it with someone who knows how to use the equipment."

Connor grimaced. "Doesn't that hurt?"

"And putting your dick up a puss doesn't? Poking a baby sack? At least when a prostate gets prodded it feels good."

"That's a disgustin' way of looking at it."

"To each his own."

"Just keep your own in your pants, yeah?"

Laughing, the captain replied, "only if you do."

…

Three hours after hanging up with Abby, Ianto waved to the short blonde from the entrance to the restaurant. She had seated herself in the perfect position to see the entire floor. Two glasses of water were on the table, along with two servings of stuffed and buttered mushrooms. Ianto sat smiling.

"You mentioned you liked mushrooms last night. You do, right?"

"Yes," he answered, flabbergasted that she would remember such a small detail. "This is wonderful. Thank You."

Abby laughed. "You act like no one ever cares what you say."

"At my job that's usually the case."

Taking in her hurt expression he stopped her train of thought. "It's nothing. Just, this is really nice. A very Tosh thing to do."

"Hmm, and that's good?" She teased.

"Very good."

"And Tosh is?"

"My best friend."

"Ianto, can I ask you something?"

After a large gulp he answered. "Of course."

She nervously fiddled with her napkin. "Just why do you want to leave so badly? Every time we mention friends, you talk about yours so fondly. You like your flat. Is it some sort of, I dunno, family issue?"

"Trouble with an ex, actually."

Abby's eyebrows raised. "What kind of trouble?"

"Well," Ianto began. He hadn't a clue how to explain his relations with Jack while maintaining dignity. With another deep breath he bit the bullet. "My boss. He and I- we had a thing. It was never monogamous; he slept with other people all the time. We didn't go on dates. Just shagged. And then he disappeared. One day, just took off and left and didn't come back for two months."

"What happened when he got back?" she asked.

Popping a piece of food in his mouth he responded, "he asked me on a date."

"Oh my god!"

"Yeah. He didn't want a date though, not really. He's always said that he can't be tied to one person. I didn't want to be a part-time shag anymore so I told him no."

"And so now you're leaving?"

"It hurts too much to see him every day. I still love him Abby, but I deserve better than to be hurt every time he swaggers into my flat smelling like someone else."

Without realizing it Ianto began to cry. Abby plucked two napkins from their holder and pressed them to his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," she whispered. "If I ever meet this guy I'm going to kill him. You know that, right?"

Ianto laughed at the irony.

…

"It's going as planned...Yes...no, Lester's not sharing that kind of information just yet. He still doesn't like me... Understood. No. I won't let you down."

…

"_This time tomorrow, he'll be back in 1918."_

"_In his own time. Would you go back to yours? If you could?"_

"_Why, would you miss me?"_

"_Yep."_

"_I left home a long time ago. I don't really know where I really belong. Maybe that doesn't matter any more."_

"_I know you get lonely."_

"_Going home wouldn't fix that. Being here, I've seen things I never dreamt I'd see. Loved people I never would have known if I'd just stayed where I was. And I wouldn't change that for the world."_

The floodgates came crumbling down as Ianto pulled Jack into the kiss. His mind reeled, knowing it was cruel. Knowing that it couldn't lead to anything. But it just felt so good...

Jack's tongue breached his lips and Ianto climbed on top of the older man; straddling his thighs. He moaned, sliding his tongue along the roof of the immortal's mouth. Hands tugged at his hair, angling Ianto's neck into position for Jack nip at the smooth jawline. It was only when he felt his jacket coming off did Ianto snap back to reality.

"Jack, Jack stop!"

Shoving himself off Jack the younger man leaned against the desk; one hand covered his mouth.

"I'm sorry, Jack. That wasn't fair. I'm so sorry."

Ianto took off without a second glance.

* * *

**Blarg! My apologies if you think the chapter sucked, I really struggled with it. If you liked it, thank you so much. I hope to have the next chapter up by next Wednesday, but don't quote me! Check out my other story and I'll see you next time!**


	4. Someone Else

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If i did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Word Count: 2,091

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter Four

…

_Her toes curled against his shoulders as he flicked his tongue over the sensitive bud hidden in her folds. Long fingers moved in and out of her opening. Every touch sent her alcohol-addled mind into overdrive. _

_He moved up her body, paying gentle attention to her soft breasts, before sealing his lips over hers. She moaned into his touch as he guided himself inside. Fully sheathed, he waited for her small body to relax around him. Then, he began several slow thrusts. Her legs wrapped around his hips; heels digging painfully into his bottom. _

"_T-Tosh...Tosh, this feels..."_

_She claimed him in another kiss. "Yes, Owen. Yes."_

…

Owen rolled over to an empty bed. The sheets beside him were cold; the bedside clock reading 8:45 am. He tugged the pale sheet over his nakedness and headed from the room.

"Tosh?" He called.

Heavy smog was coming from the kitchen. Panicked, he followed the trail to find the woman fully dressed and fidgeting with a smoking gadget he remembered having come through the rift.

"Didn't Jack say nothing leaves the hub?"

She pulled away from her toy. "He wanted me to find out if the device had any technological resemblance to his vortex manipulator. So far," She tossed the dense pile of metal aside. "Nothing."

Taking in his sheet-clad form she rose. "You should get dressed. I can drop you off at your flat if you want."

Owen looked at her puzzled. "Tosh, about last nigh-"

"Never happened," she smiled. "Now come on, if we're late it's just one more thing for Jack to be broody about. Besides, it's Ianto's last day."

"Oh," he tried not to look too disappointed. "Ah- well I've got an extra set of clothes at the hub. We can just go straight there."

He turned his back to her forced smile.

…

One turn. That's all it would take. A shiny, gold key was held tight between Connor's fingers. Blue met brown as Abby caught his eyes and smiled.

"This is it. Our first flat together," he said. He gripped her hand tight in his own, putting the key in the lock.

"Not the first," she reminded him.

"First flat sharing our bed," he countered.

They shared a short look before laughing.

"We're a right pair, ain't we?"

"Yeah, Con."

He turned the key. Inside the empty apartment sun flooded in via floor-to-ceiling windows on the farthest wall. A loft was off the left, framed by built-in bookcases. To the right was a standard kitchen and eating area. Abby lifted to her toes and placed a sweet kiss on Connor's cheek.

"This is ours," she grinned.

Barely able to contain his excitement he lifted her into his arms and twirled her over the threshold, molding his mouth to hers. Unaware of their guest.

"Ahem," Becker cleared his throat.

The two sprang apart like frightened rabbits. The captain chuckled, balancing several moving boxes in his arms.

"Not to break up the love-fest, but I thought since we were going to be neighbors I would bring over some essentials."

Connor took the top box and dropped to the floor; eager to rummage through it's contents. Folding it open he found basic bathroom essentials; two toothbrushes, a tube of toothpaste, a brush, a comb, shampoo, conditioner, soap, and a few girly items he couldn't identify. Looking up, Abby was helping to sort the other two larger boxes into piles. The bottom box had been filled to the brim with food. He did a double take as a jar of Nutella was placed on the counter.

"Mine!"

He grabbed the tub, wasting no time sicking his finger in the chocolatey spread and licking it off with a satisfied chirp.

"Oh, god! I missed this!"

"Licking your dirty fingers?" Abby questioned.

Another large bite and he replied happily, "licking _Nutella_ off my dirty fingers!"

Becker laughed as he put the grocery items away.

"I'm glad you like it, Connor."

"Speaking of liking things," Abby began.

"Ianto is not a thing," Becker cut off with a smug smile.

Abby let out a little squeak before bounding to his side. "So you do like him?"

"He's cute."

"Cute? Describing a grown man in a suit?"

"Well, I thought it sounded more tactful than 'sexier-than-hell-with-a-shaggable-accent'"

"Too much information, mate," Connor groaned. Abby smacked his arm.

"He's staying with me and Con until he gets his own place. You should ask him out at the welcome party tonight!"

"I can't do that!"

"And why not?"

"How do you even know he'd be interested in me?"

Connor shared a look with his girlfriend before answering, "Have you even seen yourself? And he was all over you in that bar-"

"No he wasn't!"

"Yeah. Becker was all over him," Abby corrected, laughing as he blushed. "Oh, come on. You'll never know if you don't ask!"

"Alright, alright, I'll ask!" He threw his hands up in defeat. "Tonight. Promise."

"Good," she nodded. "Now, if you will excuse us, Connor has to show me the new bed."

A perplexed expression overtook his face as he watched the smirking man leave. "But, you picked it out?"

He froze as he was forced down to her lips and pulled away dazed.

"Get your ass upstairs Connor."

And he did. Gladly.

…

It was unnaturally quiet. Not often did Owen not have a snide remake, or Ianto a witty quip. Minus Gwen, no one from the Torchwood team had much to say to one another. Tosh had given Ianto a goodbye card, a neatly wrapped present and teary hug before silently spending her day at her desk. Clapping him on the back, Owen gave Ianto a card. Opened it revealed nearly 200 pound sterling and a photograph of one of the few team basketball games Ianto had participated in. Before receiving a stony glare, Gwen had attempted her bleeding-heart routine; not offering a gift as she had forgotten the day entirely.

Worst of it all came from Jack. He had done all of Ianto's normal tasks that morning to perfection, and presented Ianto with two gifts. One was a large box labeled: 'Do Not Read Until London', the other held a silly singing card and several boxes of variable size. A few of the boxes held beautiful silk ties from Ianto's favorite tailor, the largest contained the complete collection of first edition Bond novels and all the movies. Ianto couldn't held but smile. Jack had remembered.

Several weeks before the Doctor, Ianto had mentioned his obsession as a passing remark as Jack watched him feed Janet. It would hurt a bit more to leave now, he decided. Now that Jack was actually showing he cared. For his thoughtfulness, the immortal received a final kiss on the cheek and a heartfelt, Thank You.

The rift alarm sounded through the Hub, and the moment was forgotten.

….

_Gwen. Rhys. No retcon. He's making excuses again. For her. Everyone else sees it. Why doesn't he? He told me he loves me. But I can tell when he's lying. His lips are moving._

…

_Why won't you give this another shot._

_This is nothing._

_Is there someone else?_

_I hope so._

_..._

There was no way they were awake, he grimaced. And it would be cruel to rouse them. Ianto felt like a burglar as he fiddled with the knob; quietly as he could. He was bone tired. Achy, fuck-the-world kind of tired. Gwen's bleeding heart had nearly cost him his life. Then arguing with Jack about retonning Rhys...After practically screaming her love for Jack. Bloody harpy had no shame. Space whale, can never look at red meat again, damn Jack and his soft spot for Gwen, fucking Torchwood. And the damn key just would not go in.

Fuck quiet.

Man-handling the door was his last option. Ianto tugged on the brass knob, twisting it brutally until it finally forced open with a creek. What waited him pulled him into shock.

Dozens of people, some sporting colorful paper hats, crowded under a welcome banner. Food lined most flat surfaces. Lights were strewn across the ceiling and windows. During his gaping appreciation, a tipsy Abby clambered into his side.

"Yanni! Baby! We we starting to think you wouldn't make it!" She giggled. "And lookit! Becker made these! They're so cute! And yummy! Try!"

She forced a chocolate covered biscuit into his hand. It was shaped like a pterodactyl. Taking a bit he smiled. Coffee flavored.

Two men Ianto didn't recognize grabbed his luggage from the doorway and brought it inside, disappearing into the mass. Abby pulled on his hand. Leading him to the crowed couch she shooed one person away and settled herself on Connor's lap, patting the now empty space beside her.

"Ianto Jones with the cute accent! This is the ARC! We all pretty much have the same accent!" Abby waved her hands in flourish. "Cept my Con. Silly boy. Barely pronounces his t's and r's!"

"And you're slurring yours love," Connor tucked her into his arms.

A cute brunette wobbled in her seat across from him. With a dozy snort she enthusiastically shook his hand. "I'm Jess! I work at the ARC!"

"She also failed to read the secrets act," Connor laughed.

Abby swung her feet into Ianto's lap. "You wanna drink? Al-ho-lic, soda, lots of beer..."

"Just point me in the direction of the kitchen," he smiled.

"No!" Abby shouted. "This is your party!" She wiggled out of Connor's lap only for him to pull her back in. He pointed behind Ianto with a smirk.

"Right there mate. Don' listen to Abby. When she thought you weren't coming she started draining the cabinets."

Ianto smiled and patted him on the shoulder. He gave Abby a brief hug, tipping her back towards her boyfriend before searching out for the kitchen. Several guests stopped him on his way, asking him who he was or welcoming him to London. A small pang of disappointment hit his stomach when he couldn't spot Becker in the mix. But, all his worries ceased when he finally found the kitchen.

"So, soldier, baker, bartender?" He laughed.

Becker was behind the counter pouring vast amounts of liquor into a blender. Ice cream, chocolate syrup, and whipped cream surrounded him. Turning the older man gave a quirky smile.

"You will not find this in any respectable pub," he stated. He emptied the concoction into a glass before covering it in whipped cream and syrup. "Try."

Raising an eyebrow he lifted the glass to his lips. "Good...what?"

Becker snickered before pointing, "You've got some cream, no, lots of cream, right there."

He crossed his eyes to see that there was indeed a fat dollop of whipped cream coating his upper lip. He kept them crossed as he attempted to lick it away, causing Becker to laugh.

"Here," the soldier brought a rag up to Ianto's face, wiping away the remains. "Much better." The welshman blushed. Becker's voice had taken a husky tone. One Ianto had become familiar with in his recent dreams.

"Ahem-so...how was the drive?"

"Long."

Both men stood shifting, unsure of what to say.

"Weather?"

"It's Cardiff."

"Movie?"

"Hard to watch anything while driving."

"No. Do you, maybe, if you are interested, want to watch a movie with me this Friday? At my place? I could cook?"

To see the seasoned soldier mumbling to his shoes like a school-boy made Ianto's knees weak.

"Like a date?"

"Not like a date. A date," he muttered. "If you don't want to-"

Not letting him finish, Ianto lifted across the counter top, kissing Becker lightly on the cheek. "Friday night then," he smiled.

* * *

Please forgive me for my lateness. Reality is kicking my ass and my muse abandoned me in the middle of the fight.


	5. You just love me for my coffee

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If i did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Word Count: 2127

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter Five

…

Philip Burton was displeased. Not only had he not been informed of the newest ARC employee, but the well dressed younger man was already proving to be a threat. In mere hours he had managed to crack the security system, reconfigure it's mainframe to Connor's standards, and make beautiful coffee. All the while giving Philip the eye. The I-know-you-can't-be-trusted eye. And the young man had high clearance, giving him access to even Philip's most personal and confidential files. No, he thought, Ianto Jones is not to be taken lightly.

Much to the chagrin of Jess and several others, he had also become Lester's favorite. It hadn't been the coffee, though the brew had been the hit of the day; nor was it his polite and professional disposition, which had left many girls swooning. It had been the dry, witty snark hidden underneath the perfectly tailored suits. Jess had been to blame. A misplaced question had begun a battle of wit between the two men, seeing who would get the final remark. To the shock of their observers Lester had relented, too afraid of decaf to challenge Ianto further. At the end of it all, Ianto had earned Lester's respect, and Abby made nearly a hundred quid off the gamble.

Seldom did he go into the field, to Becker's relief. Ianto had overtaken the ARC's mainframe and archiving, to his amusement. Having spent so much time shadowing over the data-base during his time with Torchwood, he found his way around the system easily. Even cracking Connor's back-door.

There were slight hitches. One being Jess. Since the small welcome party only days ago, the normally perky woman had barely said a word to him; and said too many words to Becker. His green monster would rage when Jess would flirt with the handsome captain. Not so discreetly brushing her fingers against his, or leaning too close. Ianto nearly clocked the woman when she bounced into Becker's arms and gave him a firm kiss on the cheek. Soaking in a breath he turned on his heels towards Abby's lab.

"It's not like we've even had a date yet. But he did ask. So that's means he's interested. Right?" He asked.

The two sat, a thermos of his best brew between them, watching Mac the Mammoth playing with several large balls Ianto had purchased from a nearby toy store. Believing every resident creature should have a name, Ianto had decreed the beast "Mac" after Fleetwood Mac's song Tusk played on the radio.

"Should, yeah." She took a swig, sighing in delight. "Have I mentioned that if you ever leave I'll kill you?"

"You just love me for my coffee."

"Not just, but it's an added bonus," she smiled. Abby detected the dejected tone in Ianto's voice right away. As a behavioral specialist, she read people easy. Not even his mask could save him. "He does like you, you know? But he doesn't want to scare you off. When you told us about Jack-"

"Please don't bring him up," he whispered.

Less than a week ago he had left Cardiff behind; left Jack behind. In his weaker states he would regret his decision. A box labeled "Do Not Open Until London" had seen to that. Inside had been a series of letters Jack had written during his time with the doctor. Some were in another's handwriting. Several letters down the line, the new writer had revealed to be a woman named Tish, claiming to be dictating what Jack said since he was in chains. He had vomited at one letter, detailing his execution right before Jack's eyes; how the immortal had wept and professed his love. Sid and Nancy, perhaps sensing his distress, had invited themselves as his bedmates that night.

"All I'm saying is that he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable. So he's waiting for you to make the next move."

"I guess so," he grumbled. "We'll find out Friday."

"And until then?" Abby leaned against him, toothy grin in place.

"I help you get the creatures out."

Ianto laughed as she sprung around him, letting out a small yelp of joy.

…

_How the fuck did you get in here?_

_I work here, Jack. Remember?_

…

"Keep picking on me about Ianto and I'll tell Emily that you cried on your first day," Becker warned.

The alarm had sirened that morning, leading the team of Connor, Matt, and Becker to the school. Connor had been sent after the students, while the other men kept watch for the therocephalians.

"I'm not dating Emily."

"And I haven't been on a date with Ianto."

"But you are Friday."

Fingers twitched over the trigger as he groaned. _Never shoot your commanding officer..._

"_Ugh, guys?"_

"What is it, Connor?" Matt answered.

"_I think I found it."_

And they were off.

…

"And just how were you two planning on evacuating the menagerie?"

Lester's eyes, to the unobservant, were cold. Under Phillip's careful scrutiny, Abby and Ianto had been discovered in their plan. As head of the ARC, it was Lester's duty to handle the situation. However, to Ianto's honed instinct, he realized Lester was enjoying this play of power. In mere seconds, he could cause Phillip to swallow an entire humble pie and spur his own authority over the man. Ianto hid his grin behind his hand in mock nervousness.

"Quickly, sir. As you can see, that didn't exactly work out."

"What were you going to do with the creatures?" Phillip interjected. "Give them to a zoo?"

"UNIT has the proper means to contain them, sir."

Both Phillip and Lester grew quiet, for entirely different reasons.

"However, if UNIT were to intercede, they would need as much information as Abby and I could offer."

"You are not cleared, Mr. Jones!"

"Actually, Mr. Jones has even higher clearance than even me, Phillip," Lester interrupted. "His former work in Cardiff gave him the highest clearance. From what I understand, you were in charge of reporting to the PM on many if not most occasions. Would you agree?"

"Yes, sir."

Phillip gawped. Smiles from Lester and Abby told him that he had just lost. The group was interrupted as Jess smashed into the room, eyes wide and voice shaking. "Becker's been critically injured."

Before she had a moment to catch her breath, Ianto shoved past her and over to the large console she was in charge of. No one dared get in his way.

…

Waiting was not easy. For either of them. They held bated breaths as the medical unit drove up to the metal doors of the ARC. The driver exited his seat and ran to pull open the back hatch. Matt and Connor jumped out immediately; Connor to Abby's waiting arms. They held each other close, sharing soft kisses. Ianto craned his neck to see the medical staff hoisting out a gurney. Lying still as dead was Becker. A firm hand on his shoulder stopped him from rushing to the man's side.

"Straight after, you'll be allowed to see him. Until then, let them save his life," Lester whispered. "You can sit in the waiting room. I'll make sure they inform you of any changes. But let them save him first."

Ianto held one hand across his mouth and nodded. The hand on his shoulder pulled away and he was suddenly embraced by Abby's tiny arms.

"Come on, yeah?"

With Connor in tow, Abby led the young man to the waiting center. Instantly, he fell into a seat, hands clasped at his mouth, leg frantically bouncing. He could faintly hear the doctors talking in the room and shut his eyes.

_Please just let him be okay..._

…

Almost three hours later and Ianto hadn't strayed from his position. His eyes stayed locked on a point in the wall. Little over an hour ago Jess had brought him tea, whereas Abby had brought Rex. He used the lizard as a worry-stone, petting his troubles away.

A woman dressed in the paper surgery gown and scrubs peered out of the room. Spotting Ianto, her eyes crinkled from behind the mask.

"He's cleaned up and conscious, Mr. Jones. You may see him now."

Without bothering to remove Rex, Ianto scrambled to his feet and burst through the doors. Around him the doctors were putting away their kit, preparing to leave. Sitting upright and shirtless on the bed was Becker. Ianto held a whimper at the thick bandages wrapping around his abdomen. Faint blood was already dotting the pure white on his side.

"Hey."

Blue eyes snapped up. The doctors had gone and Becker was watching him intently. Taking a deep breath he walked over and placed his hands on Becker's shoulders. Doing his best not to move, Becker bit his lip as Ianto ran experimental fingertips across his torso. Long, lithe fingers caressed across his skin, searching for more damage than just what the bandages hid. Gliding over shoulders, through silky chest hair, down the planes of his abdomen; Becker bled his lip to keep in the moans, not wanting to cheapen Ianto's concerns. Too aware of the tears brimming in the younger man's eyes, Becker drew him in for a careful embrace.

"The doctors did their jobs. I'm fine."

"You. Are. Not. Fine," he pulled away with a huff. "You could've gotten killed. You were lucky this time. What about the next? It's not fair!"

"It's my job! How is it not fair?"

"I can't lose you yet!"

Taking a few tentative steps back, his stifled sobs quickly racked his body as he crumbled into himself. Becker approached him slowly, holding his arms out. In a flash Ianto was in his arms, sobbing into his shoulder.

"I don't want to lose you yet," he repeated. "I lost Lisa. I never really had Jack, but damn it, I can't lose you! Not you too! I just-"

Cupping his face, Becker pressed a firm kiss to Ianto's lips. Ianto sighed into the other man, stroking his tongue against Becker's own. As they pulled for air, the captain brushed his lips on the corner of Ianto;s mouth.

"My job is dangerous," he breathed, barely pulling away. "People have been killed before."

Ianto shifted to push away, but Becker kept his hold strong. "But as long as you are here, I'll do my best to be careful."

"Do you promise?"

He laughed. Petulance dripped off Ianto's lips like a child denied a treat.

"Yeah. Promise."

With a smile Ianto brought their lips together for a fleeting kiss. "Can we move our date to tonight?" He asked. "Just to make sure you're alright?"

"Are you making coffee?" Becker's hands moved from their place on his biceps to the incline of his back, his pinky boldly caressing the top of Ianto's bottom.

"That's harassment, Captain Becker. But yes, I'll make you coffee."

Becker leaned in for another kiss, but was stopped by a gentle finger on his lips. "On one condition." Ianto's smirk was quickly dissipated as Becker wolfishly grinned, sucking the finger into his mouth and releasing it with a wet pop.

"And what would that be?"

He willed his breathing back to control and his excitement away before answering, "you keep your shirt off. That way it'll be easier to tell when your bandages need changing."

"And you getting to see me shirtless is just a perk?"

Ianto nodded. "Boyfriend bonus." The words spilled out before he could stop them. Doing a very impressive imitation of a fish, Ianto flushed. "Sorry. Don't know why I-"

"Shh," another soft kiss. His heart was on fire, his soul screaming out for the man before him. "I like that. Boyfriend, I mean."

…

Their night was spent curled on Becker's couch, Dirty Harry playing in the background as lips mapped mouths. Ianto had never had this sort of innocent date with Jack, but knew he wanted to hang on to it for as long as he could.

* * *

**Holy shit I'm sorry everyone had to wait so long! Life is seriously kicking my ass! I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I wanna know what you think, and even what you want to see. I'm getting to the smut, don't worry!**

**To all my readers, thank you for your support!**

**~Dai**


	6. Feel Alive

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If I did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Completely AU.

**Author's Note: I would like to start out with a brief apology. I had lost my inspiration for my work. Upon re-reading the former 6th chapter, I decided it was shit. I couldn't stand it, but didn't know where to go next. If you have been following this fic, and still enjoy it, thank you. It took me reading the reviews to get back in the game. I thank you all, and hope that you enjoy this revision of the 6th chapter. **

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter 6: Feel Alive

Perhaps it was a ridiculous notion, but Ianto loved fieldwork. During his time at Torchwood, he had largely been the office dogs body. It was "fetch this" ,and "fetch that". No, nothing compared to the rush of working amidst the action, rather than hearing about it later. Running through marsh, herding a Labyrinthodont back through an anomaly; it his skin on fire. Driving him with adrenaline. Acting as the ultimate aphrodisiac. Needless to say, Becker loved when Ianto went into the field too. All the way back to the ARC, Abby sat amused in the passenger seat, watching as her captain had a lapful of grimy, sweaty boyfriend. Conner simply drove on, trying to keep the moans and whispers from his ears.

"Oi! Don't make me separate you two! Save it till we get back!"

"Conner!"

"Well if I don't get it right now they don't either! 'Snot fair," the scientist pouted.

Begrudgingly, Ianto eradicated himself. "No one was getting 'IT'." The Welshman proclaimed. "We haven't gotten that far."

He neglected telling his teammates that the two had been far from innocent, however. After all, they were still grown men. They had just gotten to the point of showering together; something Ianto always looked forward to. That, and sleeping in the same bed.

Abby broke through his thoughts. "We'll be back to the ARC soon enough love. And we've each got our own office."

Becker's nose wrinkled into Ianto's neck, tickling him. "Just step on it Conner."

"Right oh!"

* * *

Pink heat radiated from Ianto's skin even half and hour after his shower. It never ceased to impress him how the ARC seemed to have an endless supply of hot water. His back-up suit clung, malformed to the heat. He tried not to focus on that as Becker wrapped him up in a gentle tongue kiss.

"Feel better love?" Ianto simply nodded and relaxed against his lover. "Good, because I have a present for you."

His eyes lit up. Being with Becker had been a whirlwind of new experiences, coming from such a one-sided relationship. For the first time, he was with someone who took pleasure in just him. Lisa had never failed to tell him that he needed to work harder, to provide for her better if he was to be her husband. Jack only took, and took, and took; until there was nothing left. This made him insistent to take it slow. Becker had agreed, and come through in spades. Now he, Ianto Jones, was the one being pampered and worshiped. It felt surreal.

"What is it?" He asked excitedly.

With a smile, Becker pulled an envelope, addressed to 'My Yan', from his cargo pocket. Opening it, he was bewildered to find a key, and a small slip of paper.

"It's a spare. To my apartment. I know living with Conner and Abby, they're a couple and you've told me how you can feel like the third wheel. Well, I want you to be around, even when I'm not there."

Ianto bit his lip to keep from smiling at his boyfriends rambling. "And the paper?"

Becker blushed. "My name. Lester knows, and so does Conner. But not because I told them. You're the only person I'll have told, in the ARC, ever. And-"

A barely there kiss stopped his babbling. "It's a wonderful present. Thank you Cariad."

"Jones!"

Ianto let out a quiet Welsh curse at the interruption. "Yes?"

He turned to address a seasoned soldier. "Lester wants you in his office, right away sir."

"I will be there shortly, thank you." He turned to his love. "Duty calls."

As he watched Ianto's retreating back, Becker whispered what he had kept bottled up. "I love you."

* * *

Meanwhile at Torchwood, Owen was going bonkers. Tosh was still ignoring the sole night they had shared, and the beautiful Martha Jones wasn't making it easier. She had strode in, a welcome distraction, that he couldn't distract himself with seeing as how she was engaged. And the mayflies. All the damned mayflies. God, how he hated bugs.

He wasn't with his own head for long. Tosh shot from her desk, running straight to Jack's office. Few seconds later the two were bolting down the stairs, Jack's face that of a man possessed.

"Right over the Pharm; less than a quarter kilo up!"

Jack smiled, something the team had not seen in a while, before running to his office to 'make calls'.

"Tosh, what's 'e on about now?" Owen walked to her station and his jaw dropped. On her screen was an anomaly, right above Pharm Pharmaceuticals.

* * *

"Well sir, they take pride in lying."

Lester twirled a pen in his fingers. "Care to elaborate, Mr. Jones?"

"Sir, I simply mean that they promise the impossible."

"We have several creatures in this very facility that are meant to be impossible."

There was more than Lester was telling him, that Ianto was sure. " The Pharm promises cures to diseases such as hepatitis, AIDS, HIV, diabetes; they promise the impossible."

"Which is probably why the 'cured' patients keep dropping dead." Ianto gave him a confused look. "A Captain Jack Harkness rather relentlessly called me this morning."

Fingers clenched into fists. "What does he half to do with anything?"

Lester noticed. Of course he noticed. "Their team spotted an anomaly above the facility and has called us in. Tell everyone to pack. You are going to Cardiff."

* * *

_So, where is he?_

_He's not here, but he's coming._

_Is he everything you wouldn't shut up about?_

_That and more, Martha Jones._

* * *

It was Ianto that led the six vehicle convoy across the nearly three hour journey. His truck only contained him and Becker, and was silent the entire time. Two months. Two months was all it took for Jack Harkness to find some way to reel him back in. Becker had allowed his hand to be clutched the entire way, fighting the prickly numbness as the lack of blood caused it to fall asleep. After a quick stop at the hotel the ARC team made their way to the Plass.

Tosh bounced enthusiastically as the black trucks drove towards the tourist office. Ianto was the first to reach her, sweeping her into a firm embrace. The fullness of him was not lost on her; his weight had drastically diminished during Jack's absence. Though still not where he had been, it was clear that he had been taking care of himself better now.

"Darling, I've missed you! Nightly phone calls are not enough!"

Ianto pushed a loud kiss to her cheek. "I know Tosh. I know." He turned to his new teammates. "You lot get the tourist entrance. Step lively."

The main ARC crew followed Ianto to the perception filter, while the soldiers followed Tosh through the tourists office. Abby's fear of heights had her up in Conner's arms as they descended, looking on in awe. Myfanwy seemed to understand that her favorite human had returned and unfortunately graced them with her shrill song.

"Oi! Teaboy!" Ianto was suddenly engulfed by the skinny medic, strong arms knocking out his wind. "You betta' 'ave a damn good explanation for not callin' me! Tosh an' me've been worried sick!"

Ianto laughed. "I'm sorry Owen, but I've called Tosh. Guess I should've known better."

"Too bloody right, mate! Call the ARC meself if I have to; they're workin' ya too 'ard."

"That won't be necessary," Becker interjected. "I'll try to remind him to call more often."

It was the first time that Owen had acknowledged anyone else had come down. "An' who're you?"

"Captain Becker, I'm-"

"He's my boyfriend."

Ianto hadn't been able to stop it from spilling out. He hadn't meant to cut Becker off, but knew that Owen would want to hear it from him. The cockney medic peered, rat-like, as though he were taking coffin measurements in his head. This continued for a few moments before he held out his hand to shake. Feeling he had just passed Owen's test, Becker brought his hand to the medic only to feel betrayed as the slighter man tugged him dangerously close.

"Now you listen 'ere, coz I'll only say it once. Teaboy's been through too much already. I have access to poisons that ain't even from this planet, let 'lone this century. We have a pet Weevil, an' Tosh 'as gott'n dead brilliant at hidin' bodies. So, I warn you now, hurt Yan, an' we'll hurt you."

Abby and Conner looked on in shocked amusement as Owen let Ianto away, complaining about Starbucks coffee. Immobilized with fear, Becker only moved when he saw Ianto treking stiffly from a pretty woman with long brown hair.

"Stupid, rotten, bitch," Becker spat. His hand guided the damp towel in soothing circles across Ianto's face. "No right to make you feel like this. No _fucking _right. What happened love?"

Ianto molded to his light touch. His soldier, blindly coming to his defense. The bile he had retched up was long gone, but still Becker soothed him. "Nothing, Cariad. Nothing that hasn't happened before."

"I don't believe that," he said, rewetting his cloth. "You don't upchuck for nothing. Hell, you don't upchuck even if it is something."

He smiled, remembering the unfortunate incident with Conner's cooking. "She just kept spouting off about how great a lover Jack is, how he makes her feel, and how crazy I am for leaving. Didn't take him long." Ianto's eyes widened as he realized what he had just said. "Cariad, no, I'm not jealous. I promise. It's just painful-"

"To think you could be replaced so easily?" Becker wasn't a stupid man. He understood Ianto's insecurities perhaps better than Ianto himself. He waited for his lover's brief nod before continuing.

"You, Ianto Jones, are one of a kind. There is no one as loving, or as compassionate as you. And if that-that _beaver-woman_ thinks that she can even begin to substitute you, then she is mistaken."

Tossing the cloth in the trash, Becker took Ianto in his arms. "That captain is a fool if he thinks he's going to steal you away from me. He is the one that screwed himself over when he failed to treat you right."

Ianto could feel tears welling up once more, but blinked them away. "Thank you. For taking care of me," he said in a small voice.

"Welcome love, now let's go. The sooner we finish this, the sooner we can bugger off."

All eyes were on them as they entered the conference room. Ianto took a free seat between Conner and Owen, while Becker took his customary stance against the wall, as if poised to attack. The way Jack was focusing on him, the presumption was not far off.

"This will be the first collaboration Torchwood has done outside its own forces. I trust everyone understands what is expected of them?" Jack boomed. Quiet nods and murmurs rang. "Good. Now, " the screen blinked on to show a young woman, covered in dead insects. "Former test subjects are dropping dead. This woman _had_ been the only survivor. During examination, she seized and these little bastards popped out." Owen was now on the screen, holding what looked to be a mutated hybrid of wasp and fly. "Upon further surveillance we discovered an anomaly, right above The Pharm. We have reason to believe that it is where the mayflies, as we are calling them, come from."

"So we're just here to shut down the anomaly, capture the creatures?" Abby asked.

Jack nodded. "Torchwood will take down The Pharm. Clean and efficient."

"What about the patients?" Gwen asked. "Surely we should be doing something about them?"

Martha and Jack shared a look that was not lost on the other occupants of the room. "The patients at The Pharm hospice have already been infected. We can't do anything for them."

"Because you won't try!"

"Torchwood doesn't get happy endings!" Jack bellowed. "The moments these people were suckered into this mess they signed their own death certificates! From what Owen and Martha have gathered, these things are entered as larvae and eat _everything_ until their host is dead. Then, they emerge fully grown. We cannot take the risk of these things getting out and infecting others."

"I agree with Jack," Martha spoke up. "All in favor?"

Hands went up around the room. The only hand down was Gwen's.

"So, I'm the only one who still thinks human life is worth anything?" She huffed.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Conner flinch. "If these thing ge' ou', then mo'e people could die."

"Conner's right," Becker stated. "A few for the many."

It was no surprise when Gwen stormed from the room.

* * *

Coffee was always the best distraction. As the teams geared up, Ianto took it upon himself to revisit his old coffee machine. To his astonishment, it had remained unused, but with tell-tale signs of the area having been frequently cleaned.

"Wouldn't want you hunting me down if anything happened to it," came a laugh.

Praying it was just his imagination, Ianto turned slowly. Of course, he couldn't be that lucky. Behind him stood Jack, a weary smile on his face. To his dismay, Becker was loading the trucks and the Plass, and wasn't around to save him.

"It is no longer my job to worry about anything involving Torchwood, sir." He took a small step back.

"It could be," Jack whispered. "We're coping, yeah, but we need you." His tone lowered. "I need you."

"From what Gwen has told me you've been fine," he took a deep breath. "Besides, I like working at the ARC. I've made friends, I have a life there. I have Becker," Ianto smiled.

"Does he know what we were?" Jack glared.

His face turned stony. "He knows that I loved you, and he knows that I was your part-time shag," he spat. "Becker's good to me. He's good for me."

"That's bullshit," Jack took his arm. "I wasn't always perfect, but I did love you. I know it wasn't in your archaic, 21st century way, but I did."

Ianto retched his arm away. "I _like_ my 21st century ways. I _like_ knowing that the man I love is committed to me, that he won't come home smelling like cheap, bathroom cologne."

"Yan!"

"I think you best leave him alone. Now," they were interrupted by Abby, whose blue eyes bordered on dangerous. Taking a quick look from her to Ianto, he resigned, heading up to his office.

"Thanks, Abby."

"Yeah, too bad it was me'n not Becker," she grumbled. "He would've taken that cocky bloke's block off."

"Fiercer beings have tried," he laughed.

"Are you saying your man isn't fierce?"

"Only to the runways of Paris."

"Op!" she squealed. "I'm telling!"

He burst in a fit of giggles as she flounced off.

* * *

"Absolutely not."

"Seconded."

"Third!" Conner shrieked.

Ianto rolled his eys. "I have a photographic memory and could hack their systems from the inside. Not to mention history. After Canary Wharf doctor's were dying to get their hands on survivors. Why not just play that up?"

"Because they would kill you on sight, love!" Becker shouted. "Or if they didn't and tried to experiment. I won't have it."

"I think you'll find that Ianto can make his own decisions," Jack interjected.

The two men exchanged glares. "I am not allowing him to go in blind. A minute ago you were agreeing with that."

"Look, all I'm saying is that when Ianto makes up his mind, there's no changing it. No matter how much you want to."

"I'm with Captain Dino-" Owen pipped. "Sorry mate, but it's too risky for ya that way."

"Fine," he conceded. "Then what do you lot suggest."

Matt, who had been characteristically silence chimed in. "The ARC is here to disable the anomaly and contain the creatures. That is it. Torchwood will handle the inner workings of The Pharm. Are we agreed Captain Harkness."

"Perfectly."

"Then I go in," Martha declared. "I am a doctor, I would be able to identify anything shady, provide an accurate diagnosis. Tosh can create a false persona for me to go in as a patient."

"And how is this different to what I suggested?" Ianto argued.

"Because love," Becker whispered. "I get to keep you safe."

* * *

_Suddenly, everyone was racing. A gun, Torchwood needed back-up. Matt had closed the anomaly, Conner and Abby had the creatures. And then the noise. Why the blasting noise?_

"OWEN!"

_The scientist was shot down. Tosh hovered over the dying man on the ground. "I loved you, Owen." _

_The world was black._

* * *

Coffee. That's what everyone needed. Hot, soul-saving coffee. To keep their minds off the covered form on the table. Ianto brewed each cup special, taking time to anticipate everyone's needs. Each person met him for their cup and dispersed. Becker curled Ianto to him. "Spend tonight with me?"

The slighter man nodded. "Let me go wash up, I'll meet you in your room. Conner and I can switch for the night."

Becker placed tender kiss on his lover's forehead before leading him out of the hub.

He tried to focus on the body beneath him, he really did. Yet, all he could think about was how wrong everything was. Not just the day, no. The hair was too long, not dark enough, to warm a shade of brown. The eyes were a dusky green; not the flaring blue he so desperately wished for. There were no smooth planes of muscle. Instead, firm curves encased in white lingerie. He couldn't handle removing it in fear of destroying his illusion. Soft breasts, trim stomach. A wet cooch. No avoiding that. Vaginal walls gave way to easily. They would never grip him tightly enough; never scorch him in heavenly heat. She had come, more than her share. He just kept pounding into her, searching for release he knew would never truly come. As her arms reached to embrace him, he took them in one fist and held them to the quaking desk beneath. Finally, finally the clenching was almost right, her surging orgasm coating her insides in wet warmth. It was just enough.

"Ianto!"

Only a few spurts, and his flaccid member was begging for more. Begging for the real thing. He pulled up his trousers, placing the suspenders over his shoulders, and left her to gather herself.

"What do I tell Rhys?"

"Whatever you told him when you and Owen were fucking, I guess."

He left her sprawled on the desk and looked out. Becker was taking his Ianto away from the hub. Away from Jack.

Ripping the match across the flint, Becker put the finishing touches on the table. Two cinnamon scented candles stood valiantly between matching plates of grilled salmon, buttery noodles and a small portion of fruit salad. Chocolate cheesecake waited patiently in the refrigerator along with a bottle of sweet, strawberry champagne. So far, everything was according to plan. He adjusted his tie in the hall mirror a third time. The gorgeous, emerald silk completed his emergency suit, and he was excited for Ianto to be the first person to see him in it.

Though the day had taken a turn for the worse, Becker was determined to bring light to his lover's day. The loss of Owen, who his lover knew Ianto saw as a brother, had rattled the Welshman to his core. Yet, his lover stood strong for those around him, and Becker wanted one night, one perfect night, for Ianto to be cherished through his hurt.

A knock at the door sent Becker into a scramble. After quickly double checking the dinner as well as his appearance he opened the door. There, Ianto stood in an eye-catching crimson silk shirt, donned underneath a perfectly tailored black suit and black tie. He stood, lost for words, as his eyes traveled up and down his boyfriend.

Ianto shifted, his face flushing. "Aren't you going to invite me in?"

"Yes!" Becker blurted out. Regaining his composer, he took Ianto's hand. "Please."

The candlelight caught Ianto's attention immediately. Tears formed in his eyes as he thought to how he never would have had this with Jack.

Becker's face dropped. "Oh shit. Sorry. Sorry. Um, we could go for that new Italian place you've been wanting to try? Or, fuck-"

He was cut off as Ianto caught him in a kiss.

"No! It's perfect."

Becker quickly moved to pull out his chair, kissing Ianto's cheek as he was seated. He then went to the small kitchenette and presented the food; a generous serving of salmon paired with warm, buttery noodles and colorful fruit salad. They ate in tranquil silence, occasionally remarking on the food or each other. Ianto had to laugh when Becker, noticing his lover only daintily enjoying his meal, piled a hearty serving of fruit onto his own spoon and held it to Ianto's lips, remarking he would need his strength for later. Going pink,Ianto took the bite and delivered a soft kiss to Becker's mouth.

Nearing the end, Becker took their plates and bent for the creamy dessert stowed away in the fridge. "I didn't know what kind you liked, but I figured-" He never finished his sentence. Ianto appeared before him, usually clear eyes dark and lust blown. He took his lover by the tie and led him down into a passionate kiss. The two men wasted no time exploring the other's mouth. Becker's grip shot to Ianto's back, clawing him closer. As though there was somewhere else he wanted to be. Belts and pants went first, before either men truly realized how fast they were moving. The friction, the delicious friction, though, erased any of those cares.

Together they tumbled onto the bed, stripping each other of their remaining suits. Becker tugged helplessly at Ianto's tie as the younger man had already stripped him of most of his clothes. The silk proved a worthy enemy until Ianto snatched it from around his neck and rolled on top of his lover. A battle of tongues was declared as they ground together, moaning as the engorged cocks sought friction.

Ianto whimpered as his lover drew back, flushed and panting."You're so beautiful, Ianto." He kissed down, mapping the Welshman's pale skin with his lips before coming face to face with his licked from perineum to tip, lapping at the pooling pre-come. He kissed back down to Ianto's scrotum, sucking the testicles before kissing back up. Taking the angry, red crown in his mouth he alternated sucks and licks. When Ianto's hands came to his hair, Becker pulled away.

The soldier pulled off and pinned his hands to the bed. "Do I need to tie you up?"

"Maybe next time, sir," he licked the shell of Becker's ear before whispering, "but right now I need you hard."

Becker captured his next moan in a fierce kiss, biting Ianto's bottom lip as he pulled away. He placed three finger's at the younger man's lips, resuming when Ianto sucked the digits in. His pliant tongue nearly made Becker forget the task at hand. With his unoccupied hand he pressed Ianto's hips into the bed before swallowing the heavy cock down to its root. Ianto cried out as Becker reclaimed his hand and slid the first finger inside.

Their bodies melded together as the next finger slid beside the other. Bucking against the intrusion, Ianto was coming undone at the seams.

"Cariad, now. I want you now!"

Becker brought their lips together. "Almost, baby. Just one more. Hold on."

"N-no. I want to feel it. Please!"

"It'll hurt," he panted. Truthfully, he didn't know if he could handle taking the man he loved so roughly.

"It's ok," Ianto kissed him. "I trust you."

That did it. The Welshman had said the magic words. Becker slid on both a condom and lube before he gripped his dick tight and led it to Ianto's furled entrance. The crown had barely passed the first tight ring of muscle before the younger man wrapped his legs around his soldier. Becker fought to control himself as chaffed heels his dug into his backside, pushing him further in. He clenched his teeth as he moved his hips in short, shallow thrusts. Ianto cried out as his lover nudged his prostate, finally balls deep inside.

The only thought he could process was, '_holy shit'_.

Lack of preparation had made his partner tighter than ever before, creating an almost painful tug on the head of his erection, but Ianto's moans surged his hips faster. The heels forced him deeper. Bruises were welling on Becker's biceps as Ianto clung for dear life. The brutal pace sent the younger man rutting against his lover's abdomen. Becker pulled his arse into his lap.

"Scream for me, Yan," he grunted. "Tell me what you want!"

"Beck! Becker! Please, I'm so close!" His eyes were screwed shut. Heat was pooling in his stomach as Becker massaged his prostate with deafening precision. Ianto's walls were quivering around him; almost too much to take.

"Oh, god...Ia-Ianto! Oh! Fuck! I love you!"

Ianto's eyes flew open in alarm. "You love me?"

His movements stopped as he stared into the eyes of his lover. Petrified, he let out a small, "yes".

A tearing Ianto pushed Becker away and moved to sit on the edge of the bed. "Don't lie to me. That's not fair," he muttered.

The soldier shifted to hug the younger man from behind. "It's not a lie. I've been trying to tell you; I really have." He kissed his lover's neck. Sobs were wrenching through Ianto's body and the defeated Becker held him tight. "I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry-I'm so, so sorry."

Holding in his own tears he attempted to move from the bed; only to have Ianto grab his hand.

"You really mean it?"

Becker crouched before him and placed a soft kiss on their entwined hands. "With everything I am."

Their eyes locked for a few moments, as if Ianto was forcing through any walls hiding a lie. He shuffled to his knees and pulled the older man to him; framing his face to envelope him in a warm kiss.

"Show me?"

Becker eased Ianto to his back before laying beside him, one arm propping himself up and the other holding him close. He leaned in to smooth his lips over his lovers. A breathy moan escaped him as Ianto's tongue pressed against his bottom lip. Becker opened his lips for Ianto's tongue to tangle with his own. They took turns licking and sucking before Ianto moved to press kisses along Becker's neck, to his chest; taking time to flick and suck each nipple, down the soldier's taunt abdomen; tracing the contours of the muscles that he had lusted for since their first encounter. Becker made no move to force him. Instead he clawed at the sheets, using every ounce of his resolve not to buck his hips as Ianto carefully peeled away the condom and tossed it aside.

"Yan-"

"I want you," Ianto stated as he straddled his lover. Silent tears tracked down his cheeks. "Everything. I want to be selfish; just for a little bit. I want to love you. I do love you." He held Becker's face in his hands as he lowered himself on the uncovered erection.

Without the condom to dull the sensations they felt everything together. The tightness and heat magnified in their bellies. Becker sat up, wrapping his arms around the younger man and looking straight into his eyes. As he thrust into the burning sleeve of Ianto's channel the two never lost eye contact.

"I'm selfish," Ianto cried between pants. "I'm selfish and broken and I love you."

Becker wiped the tears away with his thumbs. "I don't care that you're broken. And you aren't selfish for wanting what you deserve, even though you deserve better than me. I love you. I love you and I will never leave you," he confessed. He knew the source of Ianto's insecurities and was going to make damn sure he knew how much he truly meant.

The tender thrusts were becoming too much for their over-sensitized bodies. As Becker felt his balls tighten against the younger man's ass he encased his lover's member in his large hand. With a shout they came, Ianto's seed shooting between their chests. He held Becker close as the older man pulsed into his body, coating his insides. Becker lifted Ianto off and laid him out, flopping beside him. He pulled their bodies together and trailed his hand down. His cock gave a valiant twitch as cum oozed from Ianto's spasming hole.

"Cariad?"

"Hmm?" Becker lifted Ianto's hand to his lips.

"Say it again?" He pleaded.

Cupping his lover's cheek, he whispered, "I love you, Ianto Jones."

The other man nuzzled contently into his arms. "And I love you," He paused to giggle. "Hilary Becker."

Becker grinned and raised the blankets around them, pulling his lover close as they drifted off to sleep.

* * *

"_You have reached Ianto Jones. I am unable to answer at the moment, but if you leave me a brief message I will get back to you."_

Maybe it was inconsiderate, but Jack needed to hear his voice. That's as far as he got. Just listening to the voicemail over and over. Listen, hang up. It wasn't anything really, but he would take what he could get.

He had rung multiple times, knowing that the man he loved was busy loving someone else. Until, he answered.

"_Hello?"_

Jack slammed the phone down and jumped away; effectively spilling his scotch. Ianto was smart, he would more than likely trace the number. Having to go through all that work would only upset him. So Jack rang again.

"_Are you going to respond, or just hang up like a good stalker?"_

"I-it," he took a deep breath. "It's me Yan."

He hear a groan on the other side. _"It's nearly three in the morning Jack, what do you want?"_

You. But Jack couldn't say that. "Owen died tonight," he replied thickly.

"_You don't need to remind me. I was there."_

"I know," he sighed, struggling for the right words. "I know I just- Owen was dead and now he's not."

A loud clatter, the mattress moving, a 'baby, what's wrong?'. _"What did you do, Jack?"_

"I couldn't, I can't lose anyone else Ianto. I lost you. I can't lose Owen too."

"_Jack! What have you done?"_

"Gloves come in pairs."

A dial tone met his ears as he broke down, and wept.


	7. Warnings

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If I did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Completely AU.

**Author's Note: Shameless filler is shameless. I hope to start on chapter 8 tonight. **

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter 7: Warnings

And then there were five; the ARC soldiers already on their way home to London. How Ianto wished he had joined them! His stomach was filled with dread. As the main ARC team headed back to the Plass for final reviews and paperwork, Ianto sat with unease. _Gloves come in pairs. _Surely Jack wouldn't have been so cruel. The cog door opened, and his heart sank.

Staring into nothing was Owen. Shirtless Owen, with a macabre hole ripped in his chest. Never healing, zombie Owen. Ianto raced to the nearest bin and lost the contents of his stomach. Behind him, the ARC employees stopped, gaping. They had seen him die. Watched as his body thudded to the ground. Tosh bent over him crying; what sort of madhouse had they stumbled into?

"Where is he?" Ianto was the first to speak. When Owen looked at him, he cringed. The light was gone. The glimmer of sarcasm and wit behind the medic's eyes- vanished. Left were matte halloween props that shouldn't exist.

"The bastard's in 'is office. Where else?"

Before anyone could grab him, Ianto ran. Up the steps, flinging open the door with a smash. The immortal was hunched over his desk, filling out paperwork.

"You could have knocked-"

"Get up. Get up you son of a bitch!" With strength not standard of the Welshman he ran his fist sharply into Jack's jaw, a sickening crack of sound. "How could you? Time and time again you told me how much you hated this life. Hated that you would live forever. Why would you condemn Owen to the same? Why?"

Jack was on the ground as Ianto's tirade of fists and words washed over him. "I wanted to save him."

"By sentencing him to hell?"

"I couldn't let him die!" he cried.

"It would have been more merciful!"

"Yan! Ianto!" Strong arms were pulling him away, stilling his wildly swinging arms. "Love, calm down!"

Matt stepped in, grabbing Ianto's legs as the two men carried his forcibly down the stairs. Gwen pushed past them, attempting to help Jack to his feet. He tore his arm away, as if he had been burned.

In the main hub, Becker held his shaking lover. Anger had turned to tears, frustration crippled his hands, breaking the coffee mugs he had been preparing. Conner took place beside his newest friend, while Abby traced soothing circles on Tosh's back as the Japanese woman clung to Owen.

Meanwhile, Matt was in the archives. Moments like these, he hated himself. Betraying the trust of the loyal team that he now lead, but it had to be done. The careful notes accompanying each item was in Ianto's clear scrawl, detailed to the nth degree. He was assured by this. Maybe, just maybe, one of these items could save his dying world.

* * *

"How is going out to eat going to make _me_ feel better?"

"Bitching makes everyone feel good," Abby smirked. "Besides, did you want to be stuck down there all day?"

The dead man conceded, Tosh's hand in his. It bothered him that he couldn't feel if she was warm. The phantom feelings from the single night they shared were no longer enough, but they were all he would ever have. He tightened his grip, trying to feel its weight, but nothing. Owen looked ahead to the two couples walking steadily in front of him. Conner held to Abby's waist, like he was preparing to push her out of danger. Becker's hold on Ianto was much of the same, but the Welshman held the hand on his hip. He glanced at Toshiko briefly before releasing her hand. Her face fell until he moved it to the small of her back, resting.

"This alright?"

"I'd say it's more than alright."

If there was one person to make Ianto feel like utter rubbish, it was John Hart. Fate must have been playing some twisted game for him, of all people to have strode their way. Today, of all days.

"Missed me sexy?"

Ianto was not given the opportunity to respond. Becker's arm had struck out, sending the former time agent to the unforgiving concrete.

"Oi! I was only givin' the lad a compliment," John groaned, rubbing his abused jaw. "Protective bastards aren't ya? Oh, hello lovely," he turned his attention to a fidgeting Conner. "Aw, nothin' to be shy about pet."

"An' who the hell are you?" Abby came to his defense.

"Captain John Hart. And you beautiful?"

"Abby Maitland, and he's mine."

John held his hands in surrender, eyes darting from one person to the next. His eyes honed in on Owen. "Well, you're not right, are you?"

Though she knew he couldn't feel it, Tosh gripped his large hand with both of hers, saddened that it couldn't be a comfort to the dead man. "What are you doing here, Hart?" she spat. "Don't you have a planet to destroy?"

His face morphed into a lecherous grin, putting his attention on Matt. "This world will destroy itself, now won't it? Maybe I want to watch."

"What do you know?"

"Matt?"

"Quiet Conner," Matt stepped in closer. "Tell me what you know, you cockroach."

The time agent laughed. "That's the thanks I get? For comin' to warn ya? Bloody hell. Fine. Get eaten and poisoned but alien drug runners. Your funeral!"

The confused group stood dumb as he swept off, only to call something behind him. "Burton will get you all killed someday! And for God's sake sexy, don't go into Thames House!"

* * *

One to calm his nerves became five to help him sleep became 'keep them coming'. The dim lights and lack of RAF coat made it easy for him to avoid attention. It's what he needed. Scratch that. What he needed was Ianto, but that wasn't likely to happen. Between the Owen fiasco and Gwen- God why had he slept with Gwen? He couldn't tell Ianto; it would betray his trust. Again. Damn it. He drained his glass and motioned to the bartender.

"Harkness? Thought you didn't drink?"

Jack turned, body coiling painful as he set eyes on Rhys Williams. "Never had much reason to," he answered.

Rhys pulled into the stool beside him and motioned for a drink. "I know we're not really all chummy, but you look like shite mate."

Another drink down. "Hadn't noticed."

"Listen, I know I'm not the best person to talk to. Maybe try Gwen? She's always real easy."

It took everything Jack had not to choke on his drink. If only the blue collar man knew how easy his fiance really was. Part of Jack wanted to be cruel, to tear down their relationship. The other part reminded him that he had ruined his chance with Ianto single handedly.

"It's nothing Rhys, but thanks."

* * *

**Short chapter is short...and a filler.**

**I would once again like to thank everyone that has kept with this story despite my lack of updates. Life is good, and I can write more. See you soon!**

**~Dai**


	8. Afterlife of Death

Disclaimer: I own several things...however, I do not own Primeval or Torchwood. If i did, bad things would happen. Both Primeval and Torchwood belong to the BBC and their respective creators. I make absolutely no money off this.

Spoilers: Torchwood spoilers for all seasons. Primeval spoilers for seasons 2 and 3, maybe some for season 4. Takes place during Torchwood season 2 and Primeval season 4.

Oh, Captain! My Captain!

Chapter Eight: Afterlife of Death

Not being able to eat was just plain pissing him off. Everything Owen had loved in life: sex, eating, alcohol, was now a distant and sorely missed memory. The inability to sleep was simply aggravating. What was he supposed to do every night for the rest of eternity? Bar hopping was only so entertaining, and the inability to get an erection was pathetically stunting. For a man receiving his immortality from Captain Innuendo himself, no sex was a cruel side affect.

Tosh had been comforting about it; letting him crash at her flat and play the copious amount of video games she had both created and procured; completely re-wiring the mainframe, enabling television for Owen's down time. It was a mild relief during the long nights, but he wished he were in her flat for other reasons. Reasons, he could no longer act upon.

Due to his recent predicament, the stunning Martha Jones had taken his place as head medical officer. She only came to him with questions of his previous work, and even those conversations were few and far between. Martha seemed to be ill-at-ease with the dead man walking about the Hub.

The ARC team fared only slightly better. Ianto had taken it upon himself to filling Owen's day with teachings of the Hub's successful administration. The Welshman had even made a batch of his best, reacting in horror when he noticed he had made a cup for Owen, whom had only smiled, and taken the cup. Conner, in particular, found the entire situation fascinating. Much to Owen's dismay, the ARC scientist buzzed around him constantly, asking poorly-thought questions. He only stopped when Matt politely and silently deterred him.

In short- being a zombie was horse shit.

Gwen, for her bleeding heart ways, was unfazed. Instead, the pretty Welshwoman's focus laid solely on her up-and-coming nuptials. While Abby was showing Owen how to play with Myfanwy, Gwen pattered about flower arrangements, and how to stop her in-laws from killing on another. Occasionally she would offer a shoulder pat, or a pitying look, but little else.

As for Jack, he was lying dead in his office, a clean gunshot wound to his head for the sixth hour in a row.

…

"Well, I dunno. What do _you_ want to do?"

Conner smiled. They had been playing this game for nearly an hour. A last day in Wales had called for a 'tourist-day', and so the Arc team dispersed. Well, mostly. The original lovers were still cuddled under the soft hotel blankets, happy and sated from a long night of love-making. Abby was leisurely playing with the coarse hair of his happy trail, delivering little kisses to his pectoral whenever the feeling struck her. He countered be skimming his fingers along her smooth back, grinning whenever she would shiver.

"Should we call Ianto? He's the local," asked Conner.

"Don't wanna reach for my mobile," Abby shrugged. "Besides, I don't want to interrupt his last day with his friends."

"But we could ask to take Myfanwy flyin'" he argued. " 'N I know how much you've been wanting to do that."

She pondered over it for a minute. If she took out Myfanwy, there was no doubt that the prehistoric beast wouldn't obey her, forcing Ianto to come along. With everything as it it was-

"Nah," she decided. "Just stay here and let me love you."

Conner was okay with that.

…

Becker hadn't imagined there would be this many tunnels. Miles and miles of underground corridors, leading to cells and archives and weapon rooms. Without Ianto, he would have been utterly lost. He couldn't resist smiling at the thought. Ianto had been eager to show him around. They arrived early and had only made it to second of the five layers of Hub. Everything had a story. Everything had a purpose and a memory. The way Ianto's eyes lit up as he weaved their tails was gorgeous.

"Alright, level one is main Hub, two is weapons storage," he cut off.

"Three is cells, four is archives and five is the morgue."

"Morgue?"

"Yes, morgue," Ianto laughed at his boyfriend's grimace. "It's not like we can bury an operative in a cemetery after they've been weevil food."

"What about the families?"

Ianto shook his head, and Becker knew. Those families never learned their loved ones had left this world. In his shock, he didn't noticed that he had moved to embrace Ianto, wrapping the smaller man in his muscled arms. Sighing, the Welshman leaned into the touch.

"I won't be buried here, Beck," he said. "I'll be with you; we'll have plots side-by-side. Like an old, married couple."

Becker's face split with his smile. "We might be by then, you never know." His hand raised to cup Ianto's cheek, tracing the upward lips with his thumb.

"You never know," he agreed. "Coffee?"

"Yes please, Mr. Jones."

…

Just because he couldn't eat, didn't mean he wanted to be left behind. So when Tosh and Matt decided to take a lunch break, he tailed along, one hand connecting him to Tosh as always. While she led on, engaged in a heated discussion with Matt, he stared at their entwined fingers. Were they soft? He remembered them being slightly calloused from her tools, but what if they changed? Her nails had been stubby then, but still long enough to cause serious damage to his back. He grinned. The marks were still there, and now they would never heal.

"Earth to Owen! Have you been listening?"

He snapped from his thoughts. They were no longer walking, and Tosh was no longer holding his hand. Instead, they were seated in a barren pub. The other man had concern engraved on his face, nothing new, but this time it was directed at him.

"Sorry, lost me marbles for a minute there. What were you saying?"

"I asked what was going on between you two. You look more depressed than usual," he laughed.

_Ain't that the truth. _"Just thinking of things that can never be, I guess."

"Well then," Matt stood with a smirk. "You'll just have to change that."

Without waiting for a response, Matt left just as Tosh returned. He shot an encouraging glance as he caught her eye. She nodded, and rejoined Owen at the table.

"Where's he sodding off to?"

"I asked if I could pend some time with you," she lied easily. "It's been a bit since we talked."

"Since you got drunk and we had sex, you mean," he spat.

Tosh's face fell, her shoulders slumped, her arms dangled limp at her side. "I waited. For years. I waited while you went after every girl in sight _except_ me. Susie, Gwen, girls from the bars, _girls from the street, _and not once, not once, did you even think that I might care for you. Despite your awful personality and lackluster attempts at charm, I liked you Owen," Tosh raised and gathered herself. She flung money on the table.

"So forgive me if I was under the impression that I could only be attractive to you when you were so sloshed you called me Katie. You kissed, I took advantage, and I'm sorry. Workmates, that's all."

It took a few deep breaths to calm the storm raging behind her eyes before Tosh could walk away, leaving the dead man's heart broken once more.

…

They were meant to go up, make coffee, and continue their tour. The nearly empty hub was filled with Gwen's voice, animatedly gesturing at her phone. Becker caught words like "flowers" and "location", but nothing more significant than that as she screeched in Welsh. He turned to Ianto who had gathered mugs, taking too many at once. With a laugh he reached to take some of the burden when a shot pierced the air.

On instinct, Becker folded himself over Ianto. Rushed steps could be heard close, Martha, he decided, seeing the woman's trainers. When it seemed safe, the two men rose. Ianto let out a squeak, following Martha up the stairs to Jack's office. Becker ran after him. What waited threw his stomach into a pit.

Hilary Becker had seen war, seen men torn apart on grenades. Ripped apart by creatures. But he had never seen a man take his own life. Jack laid parallel to his desk, chair knocked to one side. There was a disgusting burn around the clean hole in his temple. There had been times Becker hated himself; when his father had called him a fag, when his mother had drunk herself cruel and kicked him out in the rain, when drill sergeants singled out the "fairy", but he had never understood the self loathing and hopelessness of suicide.

He watched his lover lean down and cradle the man's head in his lap. Ianto drew a handkerchief from his lapel and wet it on his tongue before soothing the burn away. "He hates waking up alone," was all Ianto would say as he sang quietly in Welsh. Becker did not get the chance to ask what he meant. Without warning Jack was gasping to life, the wound gone. The American's arms flailed blindly before gripping his former lover tight. As Jack began to whisper frantic "don't leave me, please don't ever leave me," Ianto went silent, passed him to Martha, and led Becker back to the hotel.

The car ride was voiceless, and Becker didn't know how to break it. There were things he wanted to ask, but as the two settled on their bed, he couldn't find himself ready to know. Ianto was spooned into Becker's side, cheek resting against Becker's shoulder, one strong arm stroking the skin of his neck behind his ear.

"You still love him."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"It wasn't a question, Yan," their eyes met and Becker continued. "It's okay if you do. So long as you love me more."

Ianto leaned up. Becker's eyes were a hazel brown, not a haunted blue. His skin was smooth and warm under Ianto's hand, not cold and lifeless. Ianto licked the seam of Becker's lips for entry, and the two were locked in a slow tongue-kiss. "Always," whispered between them.

* * *

**Next up: The Wedding of Gwen Cooper! I'm really excited to write this chapter! Till next time!**

**~Dai**


	9. Not a chapter Against Censorship!

Greetings to the fine folk that moderate our site.

Myself, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.

For some, that means the permanent loss of a story. While I don't have anything that I believe violates your terms of use, there are those out there that are never able to recover a story in its original form, this is something I find to be almost worthy of a legal action, as while we cannot claim ownership of a character, the stories are OURS and simply destroying them is something that is inexcusable.

It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added.

If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.

While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be looseing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.

For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.

Psudocode_Samurai

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Jay Frost

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The Dark Graven

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If you could do what some other authors have done and post this petition as a temporary new chapter on some of your stories to help spreed the word? It would help a lot it's how I found out about this.

Another thing, there is a petition going around to stop this, here is the link, just remove the space, please sign it

www. change petitions/ fanfiction-net-stop-the-destruction-of-fanfiction-net#

* * *

**Personal Note: By clicking on an M rating piece, the website is assuming you are at the age of consent or at an age where you can handle mature themes and context. Sex falls under this category, and it is a shame to see so many writers become silenced because a few did not heed the warnings. I would hate to see the website that inspired and shaped my creativity be abandoned in protest; but I will do what is necessary. I will post until I am banned, but I hope that with this petition it will not come to that. **


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